Next weekend, when I'm hosting a small dinner party, we're dining outdoors unless the weather is inclement, so I'm not pulling out all the stops, but I will host a fancy dinner party once we return indoors. I love pulling out the silver, the fine monogrammed napkins, the crystal and preparing a fancy dinner. Why is this becoming a relic? To me, it's very sad.
I love using monogrammed linens and a few years back, I treated myself to a set of monogrammed napkins from Leontine Linens. It's worth the splurge, especially if you plan to pass the art of dining well down to your children. And I am hoping you will teach them so it doesn't totally get lost! And today, on Etsy, you can order monogrammed linens at a very reasonable cost. Isn't this a lovely picture?
I plan to send out formal invitations, via snail mail. The horror! When the invitation says RSVP, did you know that you must respond to the invitation? Believe me, many people don't know that! Regrets means call if you cannot come. And call. Do not send an email or a text.
And you should always take a hostess gift with you - a nice candle, a good bottle of wine. I was told once not to bring freshly cut flowers unless you bring them in a vase as your hostess is likely busy in the kitchen and may not have time to deal with fresh flowers. If you bring flowers, bring them in a pot that you can hand to your host.
And after the party, send your hosts a nice hand-written note. More horror! Yes, use snail mail please. No texts or emails. You should send a note a day or two after the dinner. It is very rude not to thank your hosts for a nice dinner. This is a great excuse to order monogrammed stationary if you don't have it already. Crane, The Printery are great places to find exquisite stationary. Again, a lost art.
Have I inspired a few people to keep the lost art of the dinner party alive just a little bit longer? Hope so. Bonne weekend!
I agree completely. I'm actually disgusted for what passes these days as "entertaining". Don't get me wrong: having a casual get-together is fine; the important thing is to have interaction with other people. So, I decided to have a luncheon a few months back and plan to have a tea out in my garden this summer. It seems to slow life down a bit and almost forces you to "savor" the moment. I do plan a formal dinner, but not until we get into autumn..
ReplyDeleteThanks for the tips...
I love entertaining formally, the challenge is people seem to get really anxious about it. My husband and I thankfully were taught table settings and manners, but it would seem that many were not (nor do they know how to dress, but don't get me started...). Anyway thanks for the reminder! You can do a follow up about the art of conversation st the table! I was at a dinner in Washington and a very charming Senstor from New Orleans was our guest of honor. I observed him give his attention to our side of the table for a while and then very gently, shift to the guests on the other side. Made us all feel good. He was a real gentleman and his manners divine, even after a lot of wine.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to just note in your graphic about toasts, the Irish toast Slainte which is Gaelic is pronounced "slancha" not with a hard "t" but "ch" sound. It's one of my favorites. https://youtu.be/mZMBvqosoGI
PS I wanted to thank you for the suggestion about LV Harkness! We were in Louisville for a week at Derby and had a fantastic visit. On our way back from visiting barns (Claiborne and Taylor Made) we found ourselves so close, I asked my husband if we could stop. We were tired and a little road dirty but they were lovely, and I was overwhelmed with the selection. I also am now obsessed with the Santa Maria Novella product line. The body milk is fantastic and not heavy, and smells so good. Even our friend who lives there wasn't familiar with the store, so it was a pleasure to be in the know!!
ReplyDeleteLove that place! So glad you found it! Your Visa will thank you!
DeleteI cannot thank you enough for this post! One of my dear friends used to always host a ladies dinner. She used her China, crystal, linens and would set the table in a formal setting. The few of us that grew up and had the pleasure of attending etiquette school or cotillion would always attend in dresses and heels, while there would be the one or two in jeans and a tank top, drinking beer out of a can. I always had as much fun shopping for my hostess gift the week before, knowing that she loved timeless, elegant pieces she could add to her collection and eventually use with her table setting. While I was not in the financial position to host to the extent she did, I she always inspired me to have at least 1-2 formal dinners per year for a few close friends and bring back the lost art of entertaining. So often people use the excuse that finances are the reason we are losing formal entertaining. BULL!!!! It is pure laziness!
ReplyDeleteI love this post and totally agree with you! I love to entertain and use so many of my favorite pieces on the table. For me, choosing the guests, planning the menu, setting the table, and preparing the food are all parts of the fun! However, I have some friends who don't want to entertain that way, and I tell them that is fine. Just getting together with friends is the most important part. In the mean time, I will do my part to keep the formal dinner party alive!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your post on The Lost Arts - I love both of these! And I may do both again soon, I used to do them and loved all of it! You reminded me to go for it, as life is too short not to have fun using the lovely things we've collected and inherited and - being a grown-up!
ReplyDeleteHope your outside dinner party is lovely!
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Thank you Cathryn. I'll take some photos. I'm doing my best to keep the cocktail party and the dinner party alive! Thanks for reading!
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